I have heard, and also said a few times that the friends you "party" with aren't really true friends, but mere acquaintances, or "fair weather friends".. and honestly, throughout my life I have had my share of party friends where that rings true.
Looking back, I realize that I have had many separate groups of friends, as I am sure is the case for many people. I have had neighborhood friends, work friends, school friends, theater friends, family friends, friends that I have met due to our kids being friends, and yes...party friends. Many times there was an overlap between the groups. Some of my school friends I ended up working with and even partying with. Yet some, you just want to keep in their own special category. Not necessarily because they aren't real friends, but possibly because they may not mesh with the other groups well. Obviously, the more overlapping one friend has, the more likely, they will become a true friend, a BFF... a soul sister.
I was thinking the other day about my current inner circle and it's interesting to me how we just connect with certain people, some over a long period of time, and some very quickly.
My inner circle is filled with a handful of interwoven relationships. These are the soul sisters that I open up to, that I call in a crisis... or if I just want to meet for coffee or a drink. These are the women that, not only would I invite to a birthday or graduation party, shower, wedding, or house warming party... they're also the ones who would be invited to "the test came back cancer-free party" or the "I don't know what to do now that I'm an empty nester" party. I believe that these ladies are my inner circle friends because they, most of them anyway, not only know of each other but have spent time with the others, due to a commonality... me. They are my friends. Some of them were friends before I came along, many of them met through me, and now are friends. That is why they are my friends...they are accepting, and welcoming, they are inclusive, not exclusive.
I have a handful of other friends, acquaintances and coworkers that I also love dearly, yet these women have a special place in my heart. They are my party friends.
In life we go though one crisis after another. I am sure you have heard the cliché that states that we are either coming out of a crisis, in the midst of one, or headed for one. Friends, our real friends are usually the ones that we celebrate with, grieve with and sometimes, just be present with and for each other. I have attended a few close friends' "divorce papers finally signed" parties and have also taken a friend for a "girls night out" when she found out about an untimely and very unexpected pregnancy.
Friendship isn't always convenient and there are times when all I want is to sit home and relax with my family. I am definitely not the "night on the town" girl that I once was! The thing is, sometimes it's not about how YOU feel, or how I feel... it's about making someone else feel special, and feel important. The friendships that ride the storm are the ones that are together not just during the happy times but more importantly, who stays by your side amidst your life falling apart, your own fault or not.
When my son had his two years sobriety celebration, these are the women I invited, along with family...they came to celebrate because they were there for the hard times. Our true friends are there for us in the midst of crisis, we must make sure to remember to invite them to our moments of blessing and celebration also. And always remember, convenient or not, on good hair days and bloated days, when your friends need you, when they reach out to you whether for a hug or to celebrate, memories are being made. You don't want to be remembered as the one who always bails out, or never follows through, you want to be the one that is the first on the invite list to the party! Because without you, a "my kid is finally out of diapers" party isn't a party!
Be blessed~ Geli
No comments:
Post a Comment